Uncertainties and anxiety

I am about to give birth on April 4, 2020, less than a week from now.  Aside from the mixed emotions and uncertainties that I am having in giving birth, I am also anxious for the past weeks because of the Covid-19.  My mind is clouded with ‘what-ifs’ and ‘what-to-dos’ but I cannot relax because of the mere thought that the virus might affect one, if not most, of our family members.  Especially now that we will be welcoming another member, I cannot just control those living with us (but outside our immediate family) and tell them not to go out, do this, do that, etc.  Partly, I am thanking that there is a lockdown, at least people in our household are just contained here.  Lower risk of getting the virus outside.  But then, my husband needs to go out from time to time to get food supplies.  Then there goes my worry, what if he contracts the virus while buying food for us.

But when the lockdown is lifted, I am worried how we can maintain a virus-free home for our little one.  And so I am praying real hard for protection even after I give birth.

I am also thinking about those pregnant women who just cannot go out to buy the food that they are craving, especially those in their first trimester.  With what I had experienced with this pregnancy, I cannot imagine how they are managing their situation.

Clinics closed

Yes, clinics are current closed now because of the lockdown.  So me and my doctor are communicating through text and email.  Since I am about to give birth in few days, I need to have some labs done.  While I had already submitted my complete blood count and urinalysis, I still need to get a biophysical scoring (ultrasound) 2-3 days before the operation.

Last week, we tried to contact diagnostic clinics, hospitals and private clinics if they can accommodate me.  Hospitals and diagnostic clinics attached to a hospital are only accepting emergency cases.  Most independent or chained diagnostic clinics are closed or only caters to patients who need to undergo dialysis (which is still sort of emergency or priority).  Private ultrasound clinics are closed. Luckily, I found one near us that will resume their operations on Wednesday (April 1).  I just need to text them by Tuesday so they can enlist me for Wednesday.  Hopefully, nothing will change and I can still get my BPS by that time.

Pre-eclampsia, worries and Covid

As history tells us, I have a high chance of having this pregnancy complication again this time.  But I have been praying to give me this time without complications.  This worries me a lot plus the fact that Covid is another threat for me and my baby.  I need to stay healthy because I need to maintain a normal blood pressure and I need to have high immunity to protect myself (and baby) from the threats of the virus.

While pregnancy is a wonderful thing, no doubt about it, it is also worrisome to be pregnant during pandemic.  A pregnant women may think of the unthinkable and increases the worries for the baby.

But then, if this pandemic is finally over and when there are no more worries of going outside, all the pregnant women who gave birth and conquered this event can proudly say that we did it!