Fourth Trimester? Seriously?

Yes, this might be the reaction of people who have not been pregnant or even those who are already mothers. Fourth trimester exists.

Fourth trimester is the first 12 weeks after delivery. Not all people are aware of this period. It is the time of adjustment and healing for the baby and mommy.

After delivery, everyone is focused on the baby. How to make the baby comfortable and healthy. More often than not, everyone forgets about the mommy, even the mommy herself. The mommy needs to heal and recover after giving birth because giving birth entails biological, emotional and psychological changes.

Everyone’s excited for the baby

Yes, everyone’s excited about the baby. Who wouldn’t? Babies are cute and tiny and coos. When you look at a baby, it seems that there is suddenly hope. Their innocence drives us to positivity. Their smiles are heartwarming. Their stares are meaningful.

But no one sees how the mother is doing, even she, herself, cannot see what she’s undergoing. For non-first timers, they would recognize immediately their emotions.

No one sees the loneliness, frustration, tiredness, and every little negative feeling the mother is feeling. The sleepless nights because the baby needs to feed round the clock. The interrupted rest because the baby wakes up every now and then. The anxiety because of the piled up emotions plus roller coaster hormones.

Postpartum blues and depression are real but no one seems to notice. Most mothers end up crying alone because they are very tired. They want to rest but how can they when they need to care for their newborn.

I’m not saying that motherhood is something negative. Motherhood is so beautiful and priceless, especially when you see your baby smile at you and looks at you as if you are the whole world for her. But there are unseen things and no one talks about them. Why? Because of stigma? Or denial that mothers, too, need some caring.

My fourth trimester

I am finally over the fourth trimester. And I’ve been in a roller coaster of emotions during the first three months of my baby’s life. There were ups and downs. There were times that I wanted to give up. And there were many days that I cried under the shower. The bathroom is the only place where my kids cannot see me crying because of my tiredness and overwhelming emotions.

The crucial part of the fourth trimester is the support from the family. It is important that the husband or anyone from the family will take the responsibility of caring for the child even for few hours. Remember that the mommy needs to heal, too, physically and psychologically.

Motherhood is so beautiful. Mothers can be superwomen but they also need support.